I would imagine they would have small talent show every month or so after the battlement at night.
do not go bar hopping with soldier
»» The preceding trailer has a lot of spoilers so if you’re the type of person who likes their monster movies to be fresh, skip it and just read the post below. ««
I WILL BE STREAMING RAZORBACK, TONIGHT @6PM PACIFIC STANDARD TIME
- 01:00:00 a.m. Sunday July 15, 2012 in GMT
- 11:00:00 a.m. Sunday July 15, 2012 in Australia/ACT
- 08:00:00 p.m. Saturday July 14, 2012 in CST
- 09:00:00 p.m. Saturday July 14, 2012 in EST
Razorback is a classic of Ozploitation horror cinema, the story of two men’s quests to avenge the deaths of their loved ones at the jaws of a giant, mutant, feral pig.
What’s amazing about Razorback is both the directing and cinematography. Both are remarkable beyond belief for this type of film. It absolutely feels like a high-end “A” movie that cut no corners nor spared any expense. At the helm for this impressive feat was Russell Mulcahy, who has directed everything from Queen music videos to the Dale Earnhardt story to an upcoming 3D horror flick titled Bait. He also directed one other little film of note that you may have heard of – Highlander.
Directed by Russel Mulcahy, who also directed Highlander, the surreal cinematography and oddly serious undertone of Razorback is what elevates it from a simple smash-n-grab monster movie to something worthy of its current cult status. The pig itself is a splendid, full scale animatronic model, the sets are ruddy-dusted outback masterpieces, and the acting is far better than it has any right to be.
Why TF2 fans may be interested: I suspect the aesthetics of Razorback strongly informed a lot of set design and palette decisions in TF2, and the character of the vengeful, sharp-shooting old pig hunter (played by an oddly authentic Bill Kerr) is basically an elderly Sniper.
He even lives in a van.
I’ll be streaming this on Sweatshop tomorrow at 6pm PST.
Content warning: blood n’ gore, attempted rape, multiple deaths by pig (including a child), sadism, possible animal cruelty (some of the scenes with pigs + dogs are a little questionable).
RAZORBACK!!!
Seriousness isn’t the issue at all. TF2 was never serious. What it was, though, was internally aesthetically consistent. Jiggly christmas tree-shaped hats in neon fucking colors, and lazergunz!!!111 with far too many polys and inappropriate color palettes and game-breaking stats really screwed up the extremely effective “look” of Vanilla TF2, not to mention the play. I mean hats are fun and whatever, it’s just that so many of them are incredibly ugly. It’s like endgame WoW shit—everything’s constantly neon, pulsing, smoking, glowing, rotating, and so on and so forth.
New content is necessary to keep old games going, probably, but it doesn’t have to look like a grade schooler’s themed birthday party at a paintball range. There are a ton of new weapons and hats that keep kosher with the game aesthetic, too—the new Spy and Scout shirts are gorgeous, as just one tiny example.
I agree that this would be the best case scenario. It’s also the safe route, guaranteed to elicit nothing more than a chuckling groan from the TF2 constituency: “Ha ha, OH THAT VALVE,” we’ll say, nudging each other and secretly relieved.
Good signs:
- Pauling refers to “18 perfect idiots” in this update document, and referring to a space monkey as just another idiot seems odd. Still, it’s faint comfort when we’re talking about the dev team who thought “steampunk weapons” (or space age or whatever, who cares they’re all terribly designed, implemented, and balanced) was a really great idea for an update. (I love you Valve, but come the fuck on)
- A “space monkey” gag is fedora-twiddling, neckbeard-stroking, “epid fail” jorts-and-trenchcoated GBS-level of humor. Steampunk weapons (and Jarate) aside, Valve is usually way above that sort of crap.
- The monkey gag is completely unreconcileable with Pyro’s established persona. The flowered purse, the sassy poses, etc.
Bad signs:
- lmao “poopy joe” ehehhe
- WHERE’S THE MONKEY??? WHERE IS IT????? ehehhehe monkey
- Valve’s scrapped canon character traits before when it didn’t suit them. Spy didn’t used to be so French, for example, but was more generally eurotrash.
- Valve is sometimes spiteful and enjoys fucking with their fans, so I guess I could see them fucking with the very last Meet the Team short just for shits.
- “Pyro is a space monkey” is in keeping with the general downward trend of TF2’s aesthetic sensibilities over the past year or two, I’m sorry to say.
Actually, I want to retract my previous statement about ambiguity being the best case scenario. The best case Meet the Pyro scenario is a scene for scene production of MTP.avi.
